Texas 2014

People say everything is bigger in Texas. Does that mean a 12 ounce soda is actually 13 ounces? Will my feet will get too big for my boots as soon as I step over the state line? Or will my boots get bigger too? Sounds like a bunch of big hat, no cattle to me.
 
People say don’t mess with Texas, but what happens if you do? And what defines “messing” with it anyway?
 
George Strait says all of his exes live in Texas, which is why he hangs his hat in Tennessee. Can that even be true? Can ALL of his exes really live in one place? You can put your boots in the oven, but that don't make ‘em biscuits.
 
You know what I say? I say there are some tough questions that need to be asked and it’s time someone take charge and get the answers we all so desperately need. I VOLUNTEER!
 

i-volunteer-as-tribute


I’m fixin’ to hop on a 6am flight to Texas on Friday, March 7th and I won’t rest until I get to the bottom of this.  While this ain’t my first rodeo, it may be a time-consuming quest, so you can expect a delayed response to email until March 17th.  
 
P.S. If this is Austin…I still love you.